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Have Cheetah,Will View #4 “Mercenaries” (2014) – revisited

 

It’s 9:02 pm
23 May 17

In looking back at my old blog,I realized that I had forgotten one review I wanted to transfer over here.  My buddy Romey keeps on trying to get me to “Sinister Squad” (Bobby LePire bravely reviewed that here Have Cheetah,Will View #36 – “Sinister Squad” round table w/Bobby LaPire ) and I keep on saying “Maybe later”.
As you can see,this was only my fourth review and it,like the movie itself,was a bit choppy.  This is a prime example of this studio getting a very solid group of actors together and then filming the whole thing in 5 days. As I watched a few more Asylum titles,I saw the same pattern…except for Casper Van Dien’s “Sleeping Beauty” which was done right.  I pretty much avoid anything Asylum puts out because I just feel they just don’t about the process and a lot of good people get their names tainted by appearing in their movies.
The Asylum has announced that there will be a “Mercenaries 2”. It will be interesting to see how much of the original cast will return outside Fox and Nielsen (whose characters were killed in the first film).

 

mercenary

Originally posted 19 July 15.

 

I about spilled my popcorn and tea when I saw this movie was a “mockbuster” from our “favorite” studio,The Asylum. The same studio that brought us “Age of Tomorrow”,a film that I almost lost my fanboy card for watching. That movie was so damn awful…I still get razzed on the fact not only did I watch this dreck,I SHARED it with fellow fanboys.
I looked at the DVD box again….there was NO way this was an Asylum release!! With a cast of Cynthia Rothrock,Kristanna Loken,Zoe Bell,the mighty Vivica A. Fox and a name that caught me by surprise,Nicole Bilderback,whom I hadn’t seen since she did “Bring It On”.

zoe1

So with a solid cast like this,it was an amazing movie,right? Well,I will say this….the plot,thinner then a sheet of paper,is a mash-up of The Expendables meets Escape From New York. The President’s daughter is kidnapped by a rogue female warlord (Bridgette Nielson) and unless the US sets her in power of her nation,she will kill the President’s daughter (slowly of course).
Rothrock plays an CIA chief (with purple highlights in her hair) who has to find 4 tough female expendables in order to get the job done. Zoe Bell is the Snake Plissken of the group,all edges and toughness. Loken plays the sharpshooter,Bilderback is both a pilot and an explosives expert while Fox was a CIA operator that went rogue.

What makes a movie like this so frustrating is while they spent the money they seem to have on a good cast,that is ALL they spent it on. Short of a few inner building shots,the whole movie looks like it was shot at a high school and a old West ghost town. I mean,I know The Asylum productions are cheap,cheap,cheap but why put together a pretty decent cast and spend squat on a any idea of a script? This actually could have been a nice little action gem but for the complete lack of care in the direction of this film. When you use Cynthia Rothrock for one 20 second fight,you know you need to rethink of what you are doing. This is one you should skip completely.

 

Feedback is most welcome and I know Bobby will have a interesting take on this one….
Thank you for reading!!

 

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