It’s 12:01 pm
I’m a little blocked this month and have been struggling to find my writing mojo.
I decided to post a few older entries as I have done in the past.
I wrote the following six years to the day. I had gotten a request from Tiffany Hendra,a life coach from Texas asking for a little help. This was my response. This was posted on 23 Aug 12.
Its 9:10 am
Up early to jot a few thoughts down before heading off to the eye doctor. I was going to post my interview with Lacye Presley today. She and I had a nice talk via IM but after 40 minutes she had to go. I sent her the rest of my interview questions…she sent them back but I didn’t know she was doing a full renovation on her home. The answers were by someone being pulled like taffy so I am going to wait until Lacye has the time to sit,relax and take her time to write back. I feel I owe her that courtesy and I really want to show my readers just how amazing this young lady really is.
I ended up working last Sunday so I missed the airshow. But what Lori told me,I didn’t miss anything. Her store actually has a great viewing spot for folks. About 200 people park in the huge lot and watch the planes every year. But since this year’s show only featured prop planes and the only two jets flown were privately flown,the crowds didn’t show up. The jets didn’t practice during the week as well due to the high cost of fuel so I think that really hurt the attendance this go around. My neighbor didn’t go either…
Got this the other day from Tiffany Hendra,the wonderful lady who created Sanctuary of Style and did a episode of her show about how women with cancer can still rock it with style and helped awareness how hard it is for women to get a good wig.
Hey coolest guy on the planet (ok, besides Aaron.lol)
I have been mentoring 2- 17 year old girls that are SOS followers and now are practically like family. They live in Ontario. One is battling the system because she was orphaned last year. The other has cancer and just got out of the hospital for 2 months. She was suppose to start chemo on Tues but doesn’t want to go through it all. Her 19 yr old sister died last year from the same cancer and she watched her go through chemo- the horrible sickness, hair loss, etc. She’s asked me for some advice but I don’t feel qualified. I can just listen and make her feel love and comfortable. Is there any great sites geared for younger people with cancer. I know you have great blog posts but may be a bit over her head.
Any guidance or books would be great! Her parents are wonderful and I’m sure they’re helping her with resources, but sometimes kids don’t want to discuss certain things with their folks.
It’s also great to have some knowledge to guide the BFF to understand cancer as well. She lost her mom to a drug OD and has lots of unanswered questions and anger. Seeing her BFF become ill has pushed her over the edge.
Happy Friday xo”
Its my first letter asking me for help with someone who is fighting cancer. I have thought about this the past few days. I could have taken the easy way out and Googled some sites but I decided to do this instead…
This is a open letter to Tiffany’s two warriors from me to them.
I know you two young people are facing some long odds. One of you is fighting cancer and the other is now without parents. I could sit here and say “it will be okay” and “Keep on going” and other rah rah crap and I know you would zone out. So I am not going to do that…I’m going to be honest with you two.
You have been dealt some harsh cards. I myself grew up in foster homes because my parents married too young and my birth mother went to jail. Bounced around in a county orphanage and three homes including one where I was molested and abused until I was united with my birth mother. Lucky for me,the last home I was in,I was placed with Lou and Anna Weirton,who I consider my real parents. I was blessed to have gained a moral center with them. Because when I landed with my birth mother,it was like a slow slide into hell. During the eight years I lived with birth mother,I experienced things I never saw I would see….drug abuse,weapons,fights,my mom being beaten bloody. We moved 5 times in 8 years. The last stop was the worst. While there,I saw the first friend I made die in his uncle’s arms are being accidently shot by his 4 year nephew,another friend and I discovered a dead body of a hooker who had overdosed. I saw many of my friends in the neighbor go from playing sports to shooting heroin. I had a good friend who roomed with me tell me I had to leave the area within a year or risk never leaving at all. I was gone 8 months later…..but my friend,who didn’t even live but 5 months in my neighborhood,developed a nasty crack habit back when no one knew just how deadly that shit was.
Tough cards….but not impossible to overcome.
Lived in San Jose for 16 years on my own. Had some missteps there as well….ended up in a hospital ER at the age of 21 because I made a serious run at suicide. Didn’t know clinical depression ran in my family so I had to learn to deal with that,still do to this day….one of the reasons I write,it helps me get out my feelings,a journal is a great tool to do that with.
But some of my best moments were there as well…..I became a talent buyer in clubs. Met some awesome people like my buddies Jimmy,Rees,Monte,Eddie,Fil and Adrian. Had people really believe in me and my talent for the first time….men who trusted me to help run their businesses….Eddie,Jacek and Kristoff. Kept plugging away…..because you have to. You can never give up…
Fell in love for the first time in San Jose…but fate had other ideas. Lost my brother when I was living there as well…killed by friend who had a bought a stolen weapon. But all that did was make my bond with my other brother all that more special,had great friends like Chris Esparza and Chris Elliman reach out and made sure I was thought of and loved. Do you see a common theme here? For every dark day,there is ALWAYS a tomorrow. It may not seem like it and I can understand how you may think there is no tomorrow but there is.
Met my soul mate and moved from San Jose in ’99. Has life suddenly become a fairytale? Nope….we both have lost jobs when our companies closed doors,my mother-in-law developed Alzheimer’s and is slowly dying a little each day. My wife narrowly escaped serious injury when she was rear-ended by a man who was talking on his cellphone.
You look at these things and wonder “am I jinxed or does God hate me”? But take a good look around,I mean a GOOD look around. Someone is always in a worst place then you….be it the homeless man we helped find his family after 8 years,the journalist who was blown up in Iraq just doing her job,or the medic who helped save that journalist’s life being drummed out of the Army just because she chose to love another woman. A young 17 year old man,poised to perhaps gain a college scholarship,breaks his neck playing football and can’t fulfill his own dreams.
Or my wife who had stage 3 ovarian cancer and faced a 35% survival rate. The one thing they have in common is they all believed in themselves and the power of a family,a spouse or complete strangers (like I am to you) to help them overcome some very long odds. To get a chance to live life,no matter what hurdles we face.
Sort of like I how met Tiffany….through her website Sanctuary of Style. While her message is both fashion and empowering women,she and I connected as well…and when she was asking for ideas for her SoS web series,I shared with her about how hard women cancer patients have with finding cute fashions to wear while having no hair or a wig. Tiffany then created a episode that told folks about just how hard it was for women to get good wigs and little or no fashion tips. She reached out and helped impact not only my wife and I but others as well..making what could have been a sad situation into one that made spirits rise.
I started writing this blog entry two weeks ago…work and a trip to see said mother-in-law have kept me from running it. I don’t know if anything as changed in your lives since Tiffany contacted me…but you two have been in my heart everyday since. I hope you can find the strength to overcome the very dark times in your past lives to make one more real good effort to find the light that is happening now. Every day we wake up and are able to breathe,see our friends and families,to drink coffee,to pet a cat,to pay our cellphone bill….we have to consider it a great day.
Hope this helps.
Six years ago…..Lori would be gone in less then a year later. But Lacye is happily married and has an amazing child. I never got my interview because of the classified nature of my questions…I asked questions that Lacye couldn’t answer legally. The journalist she saved,Kimberly Dozier,is alive and well.
Tiffany is doing amazing work as well,still working and empowering countless women’s lives. My brother is in Portland and is living a fun live with his girl friend.
The only thing I don’t know is who those two cancer patients ended up doing. Maybe Tiffany can provide a answer to that question….
I’m off to get car tags renewed.