Silent No More

Its 2:51 pm

This has been one of the weirdest weeks for me in quite a while. I have been incredibly restless and unfocused,I can’t settle down. I owe Christa a interview and I have waffled on it,I had another interview with a new director lined up but because I posted a honest review,he got cold feet and pulled out,that is the first time that has happened to me. I like the director and we hope to do the interview in the future but I’m going to be honest here,it rankles me…..he suggested that I should have posted his interview first before the review instead of vice versa. What does it matter,the review was still going to be the same no matter what. I think it would have been shittier if I had I continued to be outgoing and engaging with the director in getting and publishing said interview and then blindsiding him with my review knowing full well what I had written.
This has happened before,I asked for a interview with actress Kelly Goudie who has starred in the film “The Baylock Residence“. But when I sent in my interview request,I told her upfront about my review and provided a link. I was HONEST with her and I wouldn’t have been bothered if she had declined. But this director had agreed to the interview and I had to watch his film so I could ask informed questions about his film and how his process works. I am not mad as much as I am frustrated by what has happened here and this has elevated my respect for Matt Eskandari a hell of a lot more.
He answered some tough questions and that was after reading my review of his film “Trauma Center“. My reviews are only one person’s opinion while an interview gives a person a chance to explain why he/she decided to become a artist. While yes,I enjoy sharing my opinion,its just that,its one opinion and no one is reading me and using my words as a barometer in which to buy or watch a film on a national level.
I got my dad’s cell phone working after almost two years of it sitting and gathering dust. Catfish and I ventured to Target and got it activated and after another three weeks of inactivity,I finally installed InstaGram and have started to post so stuff. Of course you already know I’m posting Paladin pictures like crazy because he deserves it. Of course it will to know how to actually FILM with the camera..
I got a lovely Father’s Day gift from Catfish’s mom….she sent me some movies which included both “Blacula” movies. But the best part was the note she sent with it

“Happy Father’s Day Son and my love to Paladin. Love,Mom”.

Yeah,I got choked up,I have always felt like Romey has been my brother ever since we met. He is an outstanding human being as is his family. His mom is one of the sweetest souls you would ever hope to meet. And his sister Sherry is full of fun,laughs and love. Sherry works in the medical field where she helps take of the elderly.
In fact last Saturday we went and had breakfast at the Cracker Barrel. It was my first time dining at a restaurant since Michigan has been reopened.  The experience was a bit surreal as we got there early. The staff was only sitting small groups of people and we sat outside to wait. Everyone was wearing masks except the for the smokers. (You would think a pandemic would be a great time to QUIT but……).
Once we got seated,we could take off our masks,the resturant was very quiet and if you have ever been in a Cracker Barrel,you know just how loud and crowded it can be.But it was a ghost town by comparsion. We could see more people starting to show up as we finished our meal and headed out. It was a weird experience and I’m not sure I really liked it,I mean the quiet was nice but it just seemed wrong if you get what I’m trying to say,the noise and talking add to the fun of dining out,well except if you have a bunch of snotty nose kids running wild….those we all do without,its why we have babysitters.
We went to the new Dollar Tree store which was across the street from Cracker Barrel.
Of course we were hoping to find some remnants of the film sale that happened but alas,the pickings were slim,very slim. Picked up some treats for the cheetah and moved on to the new Aldis…..when did Bellevue get such a big downtown?
It has been about 8 years since I have been to Aldis. I always know when I last visited stores and places that Lori Ann and I used to visit and shop at. There are still stores that I haven’t been into since she passed,everytime I enter such a place,I always get such a rush of memories of when we did.
I picked up green tea and a bag of their coffee and then headed back home. Romey and I chewed the fat while the cheetah was all about chilling with Romey. What is strange is that Romey doesn’t really do pets but for some reason,they REALLY like him. I have seen 3 cats and two dogs just graviate towards him like he was Dr. Dolittle. Its pretty funny when he says “no pets” when a dog climbs on top of him and promptly passes out and sleeps for hours on him.
After much thought and a couple of sleepless nights,I have made my choice to start writing on a more personal level here on the blog. I’m still doing film reviews and interviews but I going to discuss what I am seeing in the world. I think a lot of what is causing my restlessness is that I have a lot of frustration and yes,anger,toward what is happening to America. I think the fact I have emotions about it is a good thing because it means I may not be watching the clock as much as I have. Don’t get me wrong,I’m still the same completely broken old man who is really missing his wife but staying silent and not speaking out,well I think she wouldn’t want me to do that and so I’m not.
I think I’m going to surprise a lot of people who really don’t know me other then my interviews and reviews as well as having a cheetah for a pet. So here is some things you should know about me:

I dislike Republicans and loathe Donald Trump. I’m a anti-fascist and have ALWAYS been.
No one wins a civil war,anyone who claims differently is asshole and crack open a history book or ten.
Our police force needs to be retrained on a national level. My father Louis,who was a fotmer cop,instilled within me a respect for the badge. I no longer have that respect.
Racism,while completely evil and wrong,is not the worst thing,its root cause – prejudice,is far worse and more insidious.
I love military history and all that it entails. I despise the fact we are whitewashing our history away,if you have no respect for the past history,then you have no understanding of today’s issues and problems.
Corporate journalism is a cancer in this country,when the news is controlled by big business,its no longer a free press as we know it.

If you’re still reading this at this point,thank you. If anything what I said offends you,thank you – it means my writing is getting better.

I hope I make you proud Lori.

You can follow the cheetah and myself on InstaGram by clicking here.


Thank you Pam and Stacey for giving me the push I needed
Revik – It was so good to hear your voice again after 30 years!!
Romey – brotherhood always
Tom and Will – So tickled you liked my surprise and even in a short season,I’m rooting for a Subway Series this year.

4 thoughts on “Silent No More

  1. Cool! I had no idea I gave you any kind of “push,” but that’s cool. And nice post. Well said.
    Statues people don’t want to see anymore should be put in museums, definitely, and not destroyed; it is part of history and we have to know both sides.
    It’s great to have such a good friend in Romey. I actually don’t have any good friends like that anymore. People moving out of state has been a big reason why.
    Lastly, I gotta say–the quitting smoking during a pandemic? Oh my god, Michael. You made me laugh out loud. If anything, the pandemic and lockdown will INCREASE stress and worry and people will probably increase their smoking too. I bet people who’ve quit smoking are starting to smoke again, lol !!! But it’s a nice idea; very optimistic !! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sorry I took so long to answer this…..but I had a poor week.
      I’m looking forward to Romey and I having our first movie afternoon in forever. Our friend Cassie will be joining us again as well and she is so much fun. My goal is to pick out such a kick ass film that Romey will go to ebay and buy it before its over. I have done that every single time we have had a film watching session,I also got him hooked on IFC Films as well now.
      Maybe its me but I have seen a lot less smokers then usual when I have been out and about…..since covid attacks the lungs,maybe they have considered that and folks have started to quit.


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